Lobster Risk & Reward … with Garlic Basil Butter Sauce

how to cook lobster

Mmm hmmm..Looks good right?

Oh it is.

 It’s Fucking. MARVELOUS. This has to be one of the most delicious morsels I’ve put in my mouth all year (shut up, Graeme). 

But let’s go into how I created it shall we? Yes… Let’s get right into it.

I have a love-hate relationship with lobster, you see.

I’ve told you guys about being scared shitless of creepy crawlers right? See: Item 2, # 7. Bugs, rodents, bugs that fly, rodents that fly…fuckin’ terrified.

If I come across ANY of the above…I’M OUT. Just like that. Like, “wait a min…where’s Dana?” “I don’t know…I mean she was here…I…..*puzzled look* …where the fuck could she have gone?”

Straight up OUT.

And now I know that lobster is neither of the above…but it squirms, it’s got moving parts… tentacles and shit…all moving at the same time, at different speeds and in different fucking directions…

That’s more than enough to put me in a state of panic. 

But like I said, I LOVE lobster. It’s eyes-roll-back-in-your-head good. And in the summer, I seriously can’t do without. Yet when it comes to cooking lobster…

 

Every word out of my mouth is FUCK.

I start sweating and fanning myself, practically hyperventilating.

Every time I reach to pick it up, I let out these really loud yelps of panic…or screams, as they’re formally known. 

It’s sort of like having Turrets and a heat stroke, all at the same time.

I do this high-knee, marching walk. Where my arms are bent at the elbow but my wrists are flapping around like fairy wings, which sometimes aid in the fanning of myself.

I do a shot of whiskey.

I say a prayer.

I fast-pace around my apt, mumbling to myself.

I question why I thought this was a good idea in the first place.

I plead with the lobster to stay still.

I consider calling my maintenance man for help.

I do another shot (totally hammered writing this).

I start telling myself to man the fuck up and get a grip.

 

I do all this, like 4 times in a row. Then I don the thickest gloves I own… 

Stand on a chair (for distance you see).

Grab that spiny beast in the middle and almost fling that fucker into the pot.

Of course there’s a splash! There’s always a splash.

And it’s totally worth the mess for the 0.7 exact second I have to hold it.

 

Cooking this, specifically, was immensely worse because I had to do this exercise THREE times. For each lobster. 

The store only had 1lb lobsters and who are we kidding…you know that’s just not enough. So I got 3 of those bad boys.

This post should have been called Lobster Risk and Reward. You know what? Fuck it. That’s what I’m calling this. Because even though it’s frightening as shit, it is sooooo good and this is such a wonderful, non-messy way to eat lobster.  

I will say though, by the time that 3rd lobster was in the pot I was damp with sweat and exhausted.

Like when I have afternoon sex. 

I didn’t though.

Have afternoon sex.

I did carry all the same symptoms though.

Including immense satisfaction and a bit of pride.

————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

Lobster Risk & Reward … with Garlic Ginger Butter Sauce

 

What I Used

(3) 1lb Lobsters. ½ cup Butter (salted). 1 cup chopped Basil Leaves. 1 tsp minced Garlic. 1 tsp finely chopped/grated Ginger. 1 tsp Red Pepper Flakes. 2 Lemons.

What I did

Start by bringing a large, large pot of water to boil. 

When it’s bubbling like a volcano, add the live lobsters. However you do it.

IMG_20140721_142210_1 IMG_20140721_142838_1 IMG_20140721_142916_1 IMG_20140721_143009_1

Let it cook in the boiling water for 5 mins, maybe more, depending on the size of the lobster

When it turns a nice, bright red…it’s done.

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Turn the flame off, strain it and set it aside to cool.

IMG_20140721_144130_1IMG_20140721_144842_1

When cool to touch, pull the tail and claws off.

Scoop out and rinse off any green gunky left in the tailmeat

Be sure to preserve the ‘body’ of the lobster for plating.

IMG_20140721_145536_1 IMG_20140721_145426_1

The claws always take longer to cook for some reason, so after I removed them, I put them back in the flameless pot of hot water for another 5 mins.

Split the shell of the tail and extract the meat.

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Slice the meat into ½ in thick pieces and set aside.

j

When you are ready to serve: melt the butter in a small saucepan. Med-low heat.

Add 1 tsp minced garlic.

Garlic Butter sauce recipe

When the garlic is fragrant, shake in 1 tsp red pepper flakes and 1 tsp minced ginger.

Stir by shaking the pan.

Add in 1 cup chopped basil leaves and turn off the flame when they wilt. 30 seconds.

 

Reheat the lobster by steaming the slices.

Serve by placing the lobster pieces in a reserved shell and spooning the butter sauce over it.

See where I'm going with this?
See where I’m going with this?

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Squeeze a lemon quarter over the servings.

Eat with fork.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

lobster with garlic butter sauce Simple lobster recipes

What you guys don’t know is that 20 mins after taking these pictures, I split the claws too and dumped them into the pot that contained the butter sauce.

As I swirled that last bit of clawmeat around, letting my fork puncture it, scooping up a basil leaf and garlic bits, I began complementing myself for staying relatively clean through the entire ordeal, in my white, white dress.

As soon as I lifted it to my mouth, BLOOP. A little yellow drop fell on my white dress.

Do you know I didn’t give two shits? Not even A shit.

That’s how good this is.

Sigh.

Now I’m ready for sex.

how to cook lobster

 #YouHaveNoIdea

 

 

 

51 thoughts on “Lobster Risk & Reward … with Garlic Basil Butter Sauce

  1. Kinda jealous seeing this post. Lobster season just started here, I should be on the lookout for live lobster, which I have never dared prepare on my own. Your post and recipe is so inspiring!

  2. Omg, seriously my favorite cooking blog!!!
    I love all the photos, and it couldn’t have come at a better time.
    The bf and I decided to skip dineLA (where you can eat at 4-5 star restaurants at half the price) and wanted to make food at home instead… now I know what I’m making!!

  3. This looks delicious! I don’t have enough lobster or our equivalent, crayfish in my life. It’s crippling how expensive it is here so I eat it about once every 3 years.

    I have a lobster story for you. When I was a kid, heard some weird ass commotion coming from the kitchen. I went to investigate and found my Dad with our biggest stockpot and frenzied pieces of lobster all flipping out all over the kitchen floor. Dad had chopped up the lobsters because our pot wasn’t big enough. He didn’t realise they weren’t quite dead and were now the pieces were freaking out, falling off the chopping board, and making their way across the kitchen. He shouted at me to shut the door, which I did, probably screaming at the same time. Funnily enough, that didn’t put me off our lobster dinner.

    1. My mouth was on the floor just reading this.
      I don’t know how your dad did it. That would literally give me nightmares. I’d end up having a lobster phobia, haha!
      It must have tasted real good at dinner that night!

      1. You know what’s interesting is that one of the more popular ways to kill a lobster so you could, say grill it, is to plunge the knife through the head then pull in a downward motion through the eyes.

        This kills the lobster quickly but keeps it intact so you can cook it in a different manner outside the typical steaming method.

        I’m waaaay to chicken to try that though. Like I would probably pass out.

    1. Yes girl, it was tough but the reward is always worth the drama haha!
      I’ll be cooking lobster every few weeks throughout the summer. Hopefully I can find the 2lb/3lb ones so I don’t have to go through it over and over again, ugh!

  4. Omg ur too cute Dana..I was as always roflmao..ing reading your post. I know about your phobias now hehe 😉that Lobster looks more scared than you. The finished product looks absolutely delicious..I can almost taste it. Yum! 😋

    1. LOL, I think we were all terrified of each other.
      I had to empty them out of the bag into my sink so I could have closer proximity to the stove. 3 lobsters squirming around, winding their tentacles and shit…woooo!
      Just thinking about it….
      That part alone had my lips dry and my dress sticking to my skin.

  5. First off, cracking post. I laughed a lot.

    My friends dad owned a cray boat and I would get he odd crayfish (similar to lobster) off them and do something really similar with garlic and parsley butter. Me and my girlfriend would nail a full baguette mopping up the juices.

    That shit would always end with sex.

    PS it seems you are truly starting to know how I tick. Cheeky fucker!

    Smiley face

  6. Lol your writing is hilarious! I cracked up at the “afternoon sex part”. I have yet to cook live lobster, I don’t think I’m ready for that yet. Also, using the shell as a serving vehicle? Genius!

    1. Lol, yeah…I was ready for some lovin at the end of that lobster lop.
      And thank you!
      That shell thing hit me when I realized I wasn’t going to make consommé with the leftover body.
      It seemed such a waste to not use SOME part of it!

  7. I laughed out LOUD a lot at this…for someone who just did a fishmonger qualification I am very squirmy about this stuff. The first time I bought a live crab, I ended up putting it in the bath for swim rather than a boiling pot! The lobster looks fab – I think you get great lobster there!!?????

    1. Hahaha!!
      Someone understand my pain, at last!!

      And oh yeah, lobster is pretty cheap around these parts mainly because it’s so easy to come by. So more love-hate to come haha

Go on, get it out..

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