I was in Trader Joes a few days ago buying groceries as I usually do, spending a lot of time in the fresh veggies section, when I noticed this lady, who was sort of in my peripheral, observing me.
I was studying the beets because I think I’m going to play with them the next few days.
I’m trying to eat healthy, really I am.
I don’t know what it is but I just keep falling off that fucking wagon.
Again and again.
My recent demise was public, you saw it.
Pork Belly Tacos.
I mean really..
Was I really not supposed to eat all of that?
I actually don’t feel bad for devouring that like an animal.
It just…what’s the word I’m looking for…
There it is.
Eating those tender, juicy, high-fat morsels just reset my clean(er) eating progress.
So for the umpteenth time, I’m dragging my fat ass back on the wagon, starting with this kale salad.
But back to this lady.
Sorry, I’m all over the fucking map today.
Anyway this lady approaches me and you know how you can feel someones eyes on you?
Like you can feel someone is staring at you?
That was this lady.
So I turned around and sort of half smiled at her and raised my eyebrows. The universal signature for “Yes…?”
Trader Joes around here attracts more of the hippy, yeah maaan crowd, so it’s not entirely uncommon for random people to strike up a conversation with you. This is really the only place where that sort of thing is acceptable.
I’m in Trader Joes, I get it, so I engaged.
What are you buying there?
Ah, just some beets. I want to do something with beets and I’m trying to determine how many I want.
Oh, you’re a chef?
Yeah no, I just like playing with food.
Oh, well that’s nice. What do you typically cook?
Anything really, but most my food has an emphasis on seafood.
Ahhh haaa! Well, I think I’m going to make a salad for my husband.
Yes, I’m trying to get more creative. Do you think these spring onions would go well with a salad?
Oh yes! You can also add in some corn, Haricot Verts, Peashoots are fun too..the more the merrier. *wide smile*
Oooh! Good idea! Thank you! *smile back*
What are you going to add to your beets?
I’m not sure yet, what do you think?
What do I look like, a fucking sorcerer?? *swings cart around and rapidly walks away*
All I could do was blink.
Look, I’m not saying I’m perfect here but what the fuck?
How did I just get played by an old lady?
I’m working on attitude adjustment lately so I’m not going to tell you the shit that crossed my mind when she did that because I’ve already seen improvements in my behavior but 2 weeks ago I probably would have yelled out,
“Hey lady! LADYYYYY?!? FUCK YOU TOO.”
Anyway back to this salad.
I think everyone that owns a cooking utensil has fooled around with Kale at some point so there is nothing genius about this recipe but this is a pretty badass salad.
I added the sweet potatoes because I wanted a more sustaining meal and the citrus elements merged with the sweet mustard dressing do a good job of cutting the bitterness of the kale to give it pretty wonderful flavor profile.
I also included Zucchini because I had one left over from the Alaskan Cod dish last week but you can pretty much use any vegetable in this because… well, it’s a salad.
Side Note: After the Pork Belly post went up, that was the end of the corn tortillas for me.
I had the rest of that juicy poison with this recipe.
Kale Salad with Sweet Potatoes & Toasted Almonds
What I Used
2 large Sweet Potatoes. 1 med Zuchini. 10oz Kale (leaves only). A handful dry-roasted & salted Almonds. 1 tbsp Sweet Mustard. 1 large shallot. 1 tbsp Lime Juice. 1 tbsp Lemon Juice. 1 tbsp Orange Juice. 2 tbsp Sherry Vinegar. Olive Oil. Salt. Pepper.
What I Did
Start the dressing first because you want to give it some time to sit.
– In a large bowl, add 1 tbsp sweet mustard, the diced shallot, 1 tbsp lemon zest, 1 tbsp lime juice, 2 tbsp sherry vinegar and 1 tbsp fresh orange juice.
– Mix well and while mixing, slowly drizzle in ½ cup olive oil.
– Season with salt & pepper.
– Set aside to sit at room temperature
– Preheat the oven to 400F.
– Peel & chop the sweet potatoes into 1in cubes.
– Heat 1 – 2 tbsp olive oil in a large, overn-proof sauté pan and add the potatoes.
– Sauté the potatoes, occasionally shuffling them around until they start to brown.
– Sprinkle with salt & pepper, then place the sweet potatoes in the oven to finish cooking.
– Remove from oven when potatoes can easily be penetrated with a fork. About 8 mins.
– Set aside somewhere warm.
– Dice/slice the vegetables, zucchini in my case.
– Heat 1 tbsp olive oil in a pan over med-high heat and sauté the vegetables until they are tender.
– Remove from heat and set aside.
– In medium pot, heat 1 tbsp olive oil under med-high heat.
– Add in the kale leaves and cook, gently tossing them until they wilt.
– Then lower the heat and continue to cook the kale for about 5 more mins.
This helps break down the bitterness of the kale.
Lastly, toast the almonds.
– Crush the almonds a bit to open them.
– Then heat a pan over med heat and without adding oil, add the toasted almonds to the pan.
– Cook, stirring frequently to brown but not burn them.
– Remove from heat and set aside.