Smoked Salmon Salad

Smoked Salmon Salad
You know what’s bugging me?

I’m really getting tired of people saying how fucking stupid Americans are.
It’s like, as compared to who?

Like I’m getting really tired of people in other countries acting like they’ve got it all figured out.
Like they’re not making the same mistakes we are, with their dumb politicians and their stupid laws.
Do you really expect me to believe that it’s only sunshine and roses over there while the rest of us are just fucking mouth-breathing morons.

 

I’m out with friends the other day and we meet up with this other group of friends and one of the guys in there is from Norway.
Somehow the conversation switches to politics, people start to get rowdy and it’s like wait a min…

We’re at a fancy pants bar, we’re having a few drinks, why don’t we try to get to know each other instead of doing this dumb shit, alright?
Everybody just fucking relax.
But this guy, this Norway guy just wouldn’t let up.
He kept dropping all this passive aggressive shit about how stupid Americans are and it was really starting to bug me.

So what do I do?
I’m working on my temper, I’m gotta play nice, so I extend an olive branch.
Figure I’ll ease the mood by moving the discussion to his country.

 

So we start talking about Norway and I ask the guy if from west to east, if it goes; Norway –> Sweden –> Finland OR Finland –> Sweden –> Norway.
I can never remember.

He explains it to me but then he goes, “Ah the Americans, they’re so stupid with the geography.”
And I was like, “Oh yeah, you fucking douche, where’s Tennessee in relation to Missouri?”
And he’s like, “Ah I don’t know, I’m stupid too, I’m just kidding, I’m just kidding.”

But it’s like dude you know what, don’t fucking act like you have all the answers and you’re not struggling with the same problems we are.
Alright? You fucking asshole.

And this isn’t an attack against Norway alright so don’t pull back.
This is for everyone.
You don’t have to be from America to relate to what I’m saying.

 

And all I’m saying is don’t try to act like you don’t have psychos in your country, unemployment isn’t an issue and your kids aren’t somehow getting fatter too.
Like your politicians aren’t arguing over dumb shit, you’re not paying ridiculous taxes and discrimination doesn’t exist.
You don’t have it all figured out either ok?
That’s all I’m saying.

 

I do my fare share of traveling, I’m on my 3rd passport, I get around.
But like it would just never occur to me to visit another country and just start bashing it.
How does that make my experience in that country any more pleasurable?
It doesn’t.
So why do it?

I mean if you think you’re better than us, then why are you here?
Oh for school?
Yeah, that’s what I thought, go fuck yourself.

 

God why does it always have to be one country against another?
Why can’t we just all be happy that we’re not in the ocean?

 

Whatever.

 

Yeah so I’ve been seriously occupied with work lately and I don’t even know what the fuck I do on my weekends because they fly by just as fast.
As a result, all week I’ve been making really simple meals like this Smoked Salmon Salad.

I find most smoked fish to be really heavy on salt.
Like if you’ve ever tried smoked salmon on it’s own, that shit is salty.
Delicious but like woah..

But when paired with leafy greens and other lighter textures like tomatoes and radishes, it comes together perfectly, although I wish I included some avocado.
Next time..

 

 

 

 

Smoked Salmon Salad

What I Used

Several Strips Wild Smoked Sockeye Salmon. Large handful Arugula. Small handful Cilantro. Small handful Peashoots. 2-3 Med Tomatoes. 1 med Radish. An Egg. ½ cup Pomegranate Seeds (optional). Olive Oil. Balsamic Vinegar. Salt. Pepper.

What I Did

Acquire all things green and roughly chop them.
http://ivegotcake.com
Place in large bowl.
Slice the tomatoes & radishes.

In a smaller bowl, mix 1 tbsp olive oil with 1 tbsp balsamic vinegar and lightly season with salt & pepper.
http://ivegotcake.com
Set aside.

Peel off a few layers of the smoked salmon.
Toss the salad with the balsamic dressing or serve it on the side of the salad.
quick_and_simple_salads 5_min_salad_recipes http://ivegotcake.com

82 Comments

  1. Oooo! Cilantro! I love that shit on just about EVERYTHING! When I had my vegetable garden, I had that stuff planted all throughout and in between the other veggies. My favorite things about it were the fact that the aroma wafted all throughout the garden. And also, when I get that stuff on my hands, I refuse to wash them for at least an hour. I wonder if they make a cilantro air freshener or body spray. Mmmmm!

  2. Dana!!! I hear ya girl! I studied abroad in college and lived in a dorm with people from all over the world. Their only window into American lifestyle was Jerry Springer so you can only imagine how many times I got heated. Like we are all obese imbreeds but at the same time, everyone is obsessed with everything Americans. Who knows! Salad looks delish!

  3. As an Anglo-Swedish family we have plenty of ammunition on Norwegians. Just ask…. 😉

    Nice work with that fish. You really can’t go wrong with a nice bit of smoked salmon. When I’m feeling ultra-lazy and über-extravagant I have it for breakfast layered up with prosciutto and fried eggs…

  4. Being a European that spends a lot of time in the USA, I know what you are talking about 😉 Even I myself do actually get the geography of some European countries mixed up, like Latvia, Lithuania and Estonia…I never know which is which. What I have to add is that Americans are very often portrayed as “dumb” over here (a lot of times thanks to Republican politicians that are making comments that make them look less than smart). I also think that lots of people just need a scapegoat, you know? No one is perfect over here either, just look at the current events in pretty much every European country. Okay, enough about that! Your Salmon Salad looks so delicious, I just had lunch, but my stomach just started growling again on seeing it!

    1. Oh, I forgot to finish that sentence over there 😀 it should have read “portrayed as “dumb” over here (…), but only by people who either hate the US or have never actually been there (or both).

    2. This is a great comment on so many levels and not just for the flattery 🙂

      I totally get what you’re saying with the whole ‘politicians saying dumb shit’ thing.
      It’s a bad reflection on us as a nation but at the same time, to hear someone who’s not from my country just start talking shit as if he has has all the answers and is moon-walking on water – that’s what bothers me.

      *rolls eyes*
      Have a great weekend though love!
      xx

  5. I don’t like salmon, but the photos are breathtaking:) I will not comment on the other subject, though I heard many people say that about Americans. Bu then again, heard many interesting things about Jews, Russians and Arabs as well, so I guess that every nation has its share of blah blah:)

  6. It’s just jelousy… Plain and simple! Most people I’ve met in other foreign countries would give their eye tooth for an American citizenship and that includes Norwegians! Back to the salmon salad ….I find that if you soak smoked fish or meat in water for about an hour alot of the saltiness is removed. I am going to try that salmon salad right now soon as I get through cleaning my dirty house👅

    1. It’s ridiculous.
      I do my fare share of traveling and I don’t go to another country and start bashing their way of life because how does that make my experience there any more pleasurable?

      It’s like, we could be here getting nice and tipsy but here you go with the bullshit…

  7. First of all, bookmark this little number to whip out whenever someone tries to get all smug about geography: http://www.buzzfeed.com/robinedds/its-thanksgiving-so-we-asked-some-brits-to-label-the-us-stat#.ofg4O5GnVa (I know that it’s Brits who are providing the responses, but it still works!).

    Meanwhile, that salad looks fabulous. I’ll do something similar with green mango and arugula during the summer when I don’t feel like cooking and you’re right–it’s great how filling something so simple can be.

  8. Oh my god, as an American living in Scandinavia I get this shit all the time!! And if one more person says how stupid America is and then goes on “holiday” in LA and takes a photo of themselves “hiking” on Runyon Canyon I’m going to shoot myself. Also yes, Norwegians generally score really high on every list but they are SO TINY! They are this tiny cold little country that happens to be sitting on a shit ton of oil so they have more money than they know what to do with other than charge $15 for bottled water and turn their prisons into resorts. UGH.

    Anyway, it’s ironic that you then created a totally typical Scandinavian dish hahaha these ice-holes love that smoked salmon!

    Danika Maia
    http://www.danikamaia.com

    1. Oh my God this comment is brilliant is just sooo many ways!
      I completely forgot how visiting the almighty stupid America is everyones dream vacation…that is SUCH a great point!

      My favorite part about your comment though is that pun-intended last line, ‘ice-holes’.
      Ahhh Danika…you make my heart smile 🙂
      xx

    1. I agree with what Rachel said, but I want you to smack him with the fish not feed it to him!!!

      You’ve got a nice balance going on here. I find that you need a lot of fresh foods to counter act with salty things, then you don’t need to add salt. I have high bp so the less sodium intake the better!!

      1. Exactly, I think fresh ingredients, that haven’t been manipulated by a lot of cooking is the best way to go.
        That or soak the salty thing in some milk to calm it down.

        PS
        What if I did that?
        Imagine the look on his face having that oily, red salmon stuck on his cheek, lmao.

  9. Oh my god that looks so beautiful! I LOVE smoked salmon, I could eat if for days.
    As for the other stuff….I think it’s human nature, unfortunately. I feel people hang on to these stereotypes because they’re afraid to, or don’t know how to, form and express their own thoughts. Just my two cents! Us Canadians have a lot of hilarious stereotypes about us too, some of which are true ha ha! 🙂

    1. Yup, you said it.
      And I know there’s not much the rest of us can do about it when these things happen but we did manage to turn the night into a good time.
      Phew!

      Happy Friday beautiful!
      xx

  10. First of all, just to put it out there that I am slightly obsessed with salmon, so i do like evry recipe comes on me! Yours seems delicious, indeed!
    Also, I completely understand your frustration – I absolutely detest stereotypes and the people who try to play smart and recycle them. just the fact that they generalize something without any proportion is jsut annoying and shows their IQ level very clearly.
    Have a fantastic weekend!

    1. Salmon is the business and I’ll give a lot of for some good Sockeye. 🙂
      And yeah – well said.
      There’s not much that can be done when they take that ignorant left turn, you gotta try to get them back on the right track.

      Have a great weekend too gorgeous!
      xx

  11. Haha you made my day Dana!! I wasn’t going to read it now but I couldn’t help it 😀 I get you, however if I may remind you- you told me Europe is OK but only OK..;-) I’ve never been to the US but my bfriend has lived there for a long time- and yes, he was studying there, but he was honest about the prons and cons- and it looks like it really depends where you go. I agree it’s not nice when people give you the attitude, but I’ve met a few Americans living here in Europe and complaining about us and our life style- so I could say the same- then why are you here?? Don’t get upset sweetie, ignore it- if I told you what I was told just because I’m from Poland haha it’s not worth it!! Have a lovely weekend ❤

    1. Well I’m glad you gave into it and actually read my post 🙂
      As for the Americans living in Lux with you, you absolutely have the right to say what I said!!
      Why don’t you ask them that next time they start bitching and moaning?
      I’m curious what they would have to say.
      Real curious.
      It’s not cool to bash any country like that and every now and then you gotta call them out on their bullshit.
      Knock em down a few notches, hehe 😀

      Miss you but hope you’re doing well love,
      biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiig hug!

  12. Oh Dana! I love when I read your ranting blog entries… It’s like I’m reading my own thoughts! And that salad looks amazing. Let’s live together ok? 🙂

  13. I wanted to leave you a comment about your lovely photography 🙂 I’m Norwegian aswell and I believe alot of norwegians got a totally wrong idea about americans. We get alot of it from televisions as we have a huge amount of trash tv from the US! People should be more open and kind 🙂 anyway great pictures, looks tempting!!

    1. Thank you for stopping by and leaving a comment!
      I certainly didn’t meant to attach Norwegians so I’m glad you didn’t take it that way 🙂

      Thanks again for stopping by lovey and I hope you have a great weekend!
      xx

  14. When I travel, people get really confused when I say I’m from New Zealand. Not only do they not know where that is, but they don’t quite understand why I would say that when I’m clear Asian. I just let them be confused or if I’m feeling generous, I’ll say I was born in Hong Kong.

    I adore smoked salmon too but yeah, it can be pretty salty. I find the hot smoked stuff is usually less salty, especially the ones that are flavoured with herbs.

    p.s. I like your slate/tile thingy. You’re so chic.

  15. Smoked salmon certainly does look The Business. I love your rants, nothing more annoying than a tourist having a go at the country they are visiting. As a dude called Kamahl once said in his deeply melodic tones. ‘Why is everybody so unkind?’ (He is a singer/entertainer famous in Australia in the 70’s, he could rock a kaftan.)

  16. While I soooooo understand your comments on politics (here in Canada people seem to want to immigrate then replicate the things they wanted to leave behind), I won’t talk politics since it just makes me wanna rant Forever!!!

    But that plate!! That is fine!!! There is something about a visuly appealing meal. I can’t remeber who said it…. But “you eat with your eyes first!”

    If you love salmon I gotta tell you we will be posting a recipe for a cured salmon on our blog soon that you’ll LOVE!!! It’s easy (but has to sit for a short amount of time in Your fridge, looks STUNNING and tastes amazing. Best of all?? It makes you look like a culinary GENIUS when you serve it!!!

    I promise you I’ll post it soon….. Just for you.
    Duanescottblog.wordpress.com

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