And just like that it’s graduation season again.
Which means my city becomes an absolute nightmare.

Traffic comes to a halt, there’s no place to park, people are crossing the street without looking – it’s a fucking shitshow.

 

God, I remember this one graduation I went to a few years ago.

 

The thing fucking thing was outdoors, started at like 8:30 in the morning and went on forever.

By the end of it, people just started to leave.
I’m talking whole groups of families were literally walking out.

 

This was one of those colleges where there were tons of students graduating, I’m talking thousands where like an hour later they were still in the Bs.

I remember we were sitting next to this one family and you could see the dad slowly start to snap.
The more time went by, the more psycho this fucking guy got.

But in all fairness it wasn’t just him.

 

Bartnett, Michael…Barrow, Sarah….Brown, Andrew…Brown, Anthony…Brown Andrea….

 

By the time they got into the Ms, people were doing everything they could to get through it.

Some people had entirely checked out and were just sort of sitting looking out the side of their head at the person next to them like, are you fucking kidding me? Still???

Other people were doing what’s known as the confessional pose – where you’re seated and have your elbows on your knees, hands clamped in front of you, head hung low, whispering to yourself.

There was A LOT of that going on.

 

There were the people that didn’t even bother hiding their disgust, just looking around behind them like, you gotta be shitting me, YOU FUCKING SHITTING ME!!!!

This guy I’m talking about, the dad, at one point he literally put his hands out like –

You know when the referee makes a fucked up call, so fucked up even the head coach doesn’t even know what it is. So they review it among all the other refs and then they come to a decision and don’t inform the coach and he’s got his hands out, waving them around like am I fucked? Am I going to come out all right?? What the fuck is going on???

That was this guy.

 

Seriously though, congratulations to the class of 2016 graduates, mad love and respect to you guys but jeeeesus christ.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Crab Cake Benedict

What I Used

¼ cup Mayonnaise (vegan mayo for me). 2 Scallions (finely chopped). 1 Large Egg. 1 tbsp Dijon mustard.  2 tsp Old Bay seasoning. 1 tsp Lime Juice. 1 lb Lump Crabmeat.  1 ½  cup panko breadcrumbs (plus an additional ½ cup). 2 tbsp Toasted Sesame Seeds. Salt. Pepper. Olive Oil. Cooking Spray.

What I Did

You’ll notice I didn’t include the recipe for the hollandaise sauce and that’s only because I didn’t use hollandaise sauce here.
I had a leftover mixture of spicy peanut sauce from something I made earlier in the week and used that instead.

Largely because I was being a lazy fuck.

But here’s another instance where I made Eggs Benedict and for that I made the hollandaise sauce from scratch (aka eggs) which turned out amazingggg.

 

Place all the ingredients in a bowl and mix together by hand.
http://ivegotcake.com
Try not to over mix – just mix it enough to integrate all the ingredients.
Refrigerate the mixture for about 15 mins to chill the mixture and make it easier to form into a patty later.

 

When you’re ready to cook the crab cakes, preheat the oven to 375F.

Spoon a little bit of the mixture into your palms and form into a round patty.
http://ivegotcake.com
Coat both sides in the remaining panko breadcrumbs and place on wax paper, inches apart from each other.
how_to_make_crab_cakes http://ivegotcake.com

 

Heat a little olive oil in a large saute pan and add the crab patties to it.
Saute until the side down turns golden brown.
Then flip the patty and cook until the other side turns equally golden brown.

Place in the oven to finish cooking for 10-12 mins.

 

When you’re ready to eat, slice an english muffin in half and toast both side.
Poach a couple eggs.
Or fry them – no one says you have to poach them.

 

Serve by placing a few kale leaves on each half of the english muffin and stacking a crab cake on top.
Carefully place the egg on the crab cake and drizzle the hollandaise sauce over it.

Shake out a few seasame seeds to garnish is all.
dana_fashina_recipes http://ivegotcake.com Crab_cake_benedict_recipe
Alternatively you can skip the carbs of the muffin and just serve with the egg on top.
Or have the crab cakes on their own with a spoon of tartar sauce on the side.

This makes about 6 crab cakes, depending on the size of your patties.
Crab_cake_benedictdana_fashina_food

75 Comments

  1. Okay, so that baffled/angry coach face you described? Maybe call it the bangrled coach face? I had a thought several years ago while watching football. Penn State was on TV and Joe Paterno was coaching them (this was back before the scandal and has nothing to do with that… Paterno was just the guy coaching who made me realize this), and he was confused at a call and made the bangrled coach face. I had the thought of, “wow, I have seen this man make exactly THAT face on the sideline countless times in my life. I don’t know him personally, but just imagine how much of his life he’s spent on a sideline making EXACTLY THAT FACE. I’ll bet he’s spent months of his life just making that (bangrled) face. That’s insane.”

    It is crazy to think how much of our lives is spent doing weird stuff like that. How many months have I spent making that face? How many days have I spent pouring milk in my cereal? Will I be eligible for social security before they finish reading the names at my OWN college graduation…..”

    1. Hahahahaha!!!!!!
      Why do you always leave the best comments ever??
      Seriously you always say just the oddest things that are just so freakin spot on and sometimes so fucking left field – I just die laughing reading your shit.
      Every single time lololol

      1. Ha!

        What can I say, your stories just happen to trigger these random tangents. I think I’ve kind of always been like that with the out of left field commentaries. We should have been friends in college. These conversations were even more fun at 1 AM after a drink or two.

      2. Oh my god yes.
        We’d need no other company either.

        Just us yapping away, creating the most bizarre stories and running with them until they branched out into another land of bizarre.
        And we’d be dead ass serious about the scenarios we’d come up with too.
        Afterwards we’d look back at the night as time very well spent.

  2. I need to go to those crab cakes, like, yesterday. It wasn’t until I had a poached egg on top of some tuna tartare that I realized how good the combination of runny yolk and seafood really was, but there you go. I’m sure it’s freaking phenomenal here!

  3. Hey thanks for coming to check out my story over at my blog. I thought I’d check out your site as well, and hello! I’m glad I did! This looks fantastic! Spicy peanut sauce? Toasted sesames? Great ideas!

  4. I don’t know which I love more about this post, the pictures or the story that made me laugh! Both, both is good.

    shesjustlikeheaven.wordpress.com

    1. Hahaha, thank you!!
      You ought to see my fridge.
      I’ve got all sorts of tiny jars filled with little mixture of sauces and marinades.
      I always feel bad about throwing leftover creations out so I end up using them in non conventional ways haha

    1. Yesterday I was so hungry and my buddy at work said he was gonna hit up one of the food trucks near by so I went with him.
      We stuffed our faces so fucking much you may as well have put me in a choke hold because 10 mins later I was knocked the fuck out.

  5. Wow, I can’t believe they do graduation like that! My uni is pretty small (10,000 undergrad students according to good ol’ Wikipedia) and even so they break graduation down into groups, so like arts grads one day, sciences another, economics another, law another etc etc. And even then, my own graduation was boring as shit to the extent I’ve not gone to another!
    Crab cake Benedict is a great idea and looks SO GOOD.

  6. OMG Dana! These are the absolutely more gorgeous crab cakes that I have EVER SEEN in my entire life!!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂
    (And I hear ya about the ‘graduation’ thing – last year when my son graduated from Virginia Tech it took forever….)

    1. WOOOOOO, COMPLIMENT!!!!!
      Thank you Linda, you just made my morning!!

      As for graduations;
      MIT, Harvard, BU, Simmons, WPI, Wentworth…everyone and their great grandmother is here during May.

  7. MY GOODNESS. That first photo is just drool worthy… and I’m so glad I don’t live in a town with a college. Boston must be crazy this time of year. There are so many schools near you!

    1. Dude Boston is NUTS!!
      Harvard is graduating.
      MIT is graduating.
      BU is graduating.
      WPI is graduating.
      Simmons is graduating.
      Wentworth is graduating.

      The list serious goes on and on and they’re all within 10 miles of each other (except WPI), GRRRRRRRRR!!!!!

  8. That looks amazing Dana, I’m definitely doing it for our friends when they come up to the cottage this summer.
    I didn’t even go to my graduation, believe it or not. My MIL was not happy about it and it was only years later that I discovered why, she had dropped out of university and was so damn proud that I had completed my degree that she couldn’t believe I would skip the ceremony. I wish she had told me, I would have gone even if it meant we would all have pulled out hair out and gouged out eyeballs out!

    1. Hahaha, awwww!
      Its funny because over the weekend a couple of my friends friends were saying that they skipped their graduation too and went to Newport Beach with their parents instead.

      Genius.

  9. Good lord, Dana, this is a last meal level of yum, oh my! I could eat all six crab cakes and feel no shame for not sharing. I’m curious about why you go with vegan mayo . . . . I know you don’t do dairy . . . . just wondering.

    [A long time ago] my class graduation went for 8 hours and my last name starts with T. It bucketed down so much rain that day that no one could really leave unless they were prepared to have some seriously red mud all over their clothes from the mid-thighs down. I’m sure that experience alone put many people off of tertiary education.

    1. I gho with Vegan Mayo because I can’t find any non-dairy mayo I like besides this one called, Veganese.
      It’s as close to mayonnaise I could find.

      8 HOURS!!???!!!
      OH my god.
      Oh ym god oh my god oh my god.

      1. Dana, I’m baffled – why is there dairy in mayo? We don’t put milk in ours (homemade or store bought).
        It really makes you realise how closely we need to pay attention to labels.
        Glad you found a good sub.

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